Understanding Perinatal Mood Disorders: Signs, Screening, and the Path to Healing for Utah Families
Understanding Perinatal Mood Disorders: Signs, Screening, and the Path to Healing for Utah Families
The onset of a perinatal mood disorder—whether during pregnancy or in the months following birth—can be overwhelming, confusing, and deeply frightening. Many parents describe it as suddenly losing their emotional footing right when they expected to feel excitement or joy. What makes this experience even more complicated is the persistent cultural narrative that new parenthood, especially motherhood, is supposed to be blissful. When those feelings don’t match reality, parents often wonder what is wrong with them.
In Utah, this concern is even more urgent. Recent data reveals that 44.8% of individuals in Utah experience perinatal mood disorders (PMDs). This is nearly half of those who go through pregnancy or postpartum. And importantly, PMDs do not affect only mothers—they ripple out to partners, spouses, children, and entire family systems. When one member of a family is struggling emotionally, everyone feels the impact.
Yet despite how common, treatable, and understandable these conditions are, many parents continue to suffer in silence. One of the biggest reasons? The pressure to be a “good mom.”
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The “Good Mom” Myth and Its Hidden Consequences
The desire to be a good mom can feel like a guiding star—an internal compass meant to steer parents toward nurturing, showing up, and doing everything “right” for their baby. Many parents entering pregnancy tell themselves, “If I try hard enough, I won’t feel anxious or depressed.” But in practice, this good-mom pressure often works against emotional wellbeing.
When depression, anxiety, or perinatal OCD appear, parents may judge themselves harshly for having symptoms at all:
• “If I were a better mom, I wouldn’t feel this way.”
• “I shouldn’t be anxious—I have a healthy baby.”
• “Good moms don’t get angry, overwhelmed, or numb.”
But here is the truth:
Perinatal mood disorders are not caused by a person’s parenting ability, personality, or effort level. They are the result of biological, hormonal, environmental, and psychological factors.
In fact, the pressure to be a good mom is often what hides symptoms. Many parents try to push through, over-compensate, or pretend everything is fine because they believe admitting their struggles means they are failing. As a result, PMDs can go unseen and untreated far longer than necessary.
The good-mom myth tells parents they should always handle everything, enjoy everything, and be everything. Yet ironically, it’s the presence of depression, anxiety, and OCD—not the parent themselves—that disrupts their ability to feel grounded, connected, and confident.
Recognizing this separation—you are not the disorder—is one of the first steps to healing.
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Why Screening Matters: Understanding the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS)
One of the most commonly used tools to screen for perinatal mood disorders is the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS). Many OBGYN and pediatric clinics administer it as a standard part of care. While the score gives clinicians a quick understanding of risk levels, the value of the EPDS goes far beyond numbers.
Even reading through the questions themselves can help parents identify symptoms they might have normalized or minimized. Sometimes parents don’t realize how much they’ve changed until a quiet, simple question like “Do you look forward to things?” makes them pause.
Below are a few key areas the EPDS highlights—written in everyday language—along with ways to notice them in yourself or a loved one.
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1. Changes in Humor and the Ability to See the “Funny Side” of Things
One of the earliest emotional shifts in perinatal depression is a fading sense of humor. That doesn’t mean you’re supposed to laugh constantly—parenthood is hard. But if you used to find small moments amusing and now nothing feels funny, it may be a sign worth noticing.
Ask yourself or a loved one:
• “How often do you laugh lately?”
• “Do you feel like yourself when something humorous happens?”
Sometimes partners notice this first. A person who once giggled easily may suddenly seem flat, neutral, or emotionally withdrawn. This change is not a character flaw—it is a symptom.
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2. Loss of Interest in Activities You Usually Enjoy
Parents often assume this is “normal,” especially postpartum when time, sleep, and energy are limited. But depression isn’t just about losing opportunities—it’s about losing desire.
It can help to ask:
• “If someone offered to watch the baby while you do something you used to love, would you want to go?”
• “Do hobbies, friends, or relaxing activities still feel appealing?”
If the answer is “I don’t care,” “Not really,” or “What’s the point?”—that’s important information.
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3. Excessive Self-Blame and Over-Apologizing
Many parents with PMDs describe feeling like everything is their fault—even minor, unrelated, or unavoidable things. A dropped bottle, a fussy baby, a messy house, a late nap. Guilt becomes the default emotion.
Watch for:
• Apologizing for things no one expects an apology for
• Saying “I should have…” frequently
• Feeling like a burden
• Comparing oneself constantly to other parents
This isn’t a personality trait—it’s a symptom rooted in depression and anxiety.
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4. Anxiety or Worry That Doesn’t Match the Situation
Perinatal anxiety is incredibly common and often misunderstood. Many people assume anxiety means “being worried,” but in a perinatal context, it can look like:
• intrusive “what if” thoughts
• fear something bad will happen even when everything is fine
• racing thoughts about safety, routine, or health
• difficulty relaxing even when the baby is asleep
The key phrase in the EPDS is “for no good reason.” In other words, the emotional reaction is larger than the situation.
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5. Thoughts of Harm or Self-Harm
The EPDS asks directly about self-harm thoughts—not because they are common, but because they are important to recognize immediately. Any thoughts of wanting to disappear, escape, or harm oneself should be taken seriously, without judgment.
If you or someone you know ever reaches this point, please reach out to a professional, contact a crisis line, or tell a trusted person right away.
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Why Early Recognition Matters
Perinatal mood disorders are highly treatable. With the right combination of support, therapy, and sometimes medication, most parents experience significant improvement. Early recognition shortens the recovery time, reduces distress, and helps families regain stability.
When untreated, PMDs can impact emotional bonding, sleep, relationships, and overall wellbeing. But catching symptoms early—even through self-reflection—creates a powerful opportunity for healing.
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When to Seek Help
If any of the EPDS-related signs resonate with you, or if you simply feel off—emotionally, mentally, or physically—it’s absolutely appropriate to reach out for help. You do not need to hit a crisis point to deserve support.
Seek help if:
• You feel persistently overwhelmed
• Anxiety impacts your daily routine
• You no longer enjoy things
• You feel detached from your baby or partner
• You experience intrusive or repetitive thoughts
• You find yourself withdrawing from others
• Your sleep is disrupted beyond what’s typical for postpartum
• You feel hopeless, numb, or unlike yourself
Even if what you’re feeling seems small or “not bad enough,” speaking with someone trained in perinatal mental health can bring tremendous relief.
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The Gold Standard of Care for Perinatal Mood Disorders
While every person’s healing path is unique, the most effective treatment model for perinatal mood disorders involves a combination of three core elements:
1. Support
2. Therapy
3. Medication (when needed)
These three pillars create a comprehensive, compassionate framework for recovery.
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1. Support: Creating a Network That Actually Helps
Support is more than “Let me know if you need anything.”
Parents in the perinatal period often don’t have the mental or emotional bandwidth to delegate tasks, ask for help, or explain what they need.
Instead of asking—just do.
Some examples of effective support include:
• Bringing meals without needing to come inside
• Doing dishes, laundry, or bottles
• Watching baby while the parent showers or naps
• Offering emotional companionship without trying to fix anything
• Checking in regularly with messages that don’t require a long reply
You can also watch for subtle signs:
• Does the parent seem disconnected or distant?
• Do they talk negatively about themselves?
• Are they increasingly anxious about small things?
• Do they have difficulty resting, even when help is available?
These are gentle indicators that they may need more structured support.
Most importantly, never assume everything is okay.
Perinatal mood disorders often look invisible from the outside.
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2. Therapy: Working With a Perinatal-Trained Therapist
Not all therapists specialize in perinatal mental health. Perinatal-trained clinicians have additional education and experience in:
• postpartum depression
• postpartum anxiety
• perinatal OCD
• traumatic birth experiences
• breastfeeding and formula-feeding challenges
• NICU stays
• pregnancy after loss
• identity shifts
• relationship changes in early parenthood
A perinatal specialist understands the nuances of intrusive thoughts, hormonal fluctuations, sleep deprivation, attachment, and the psychological load of new parenthood. They can differentiate typical new-parent stress from clinical symptoms that need treatment.
Therapy may include:
• Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART)
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
• Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) for OCD
• Compassion-focused work
• Trauma processing
• Couples or family support
• Emotional regulation strategies
• Sleep and routine support
This work is not about judging your parenting—it is about supporting your health, so you can feel grounded, confident, and connected in your role.
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3. Medication: When and Why It Helps
Medication can feel intimidating for many parents. They may worry it means they’re failing, or that it will affect their baby. But the reality is:
Medication is one of the most effective and safe tools for treating perinatal mood disorders.
When prescribed by a clinician trained in perinatal mental health, medication can:
• stabilize mood
• reduce anxiety
• alleviate intrusive thoughts
• restore sleep patterns
• minimize irritability
• make therapy more effective
Just as you would see a heart specialist for heart medication, it’s important to see a prescribing doctor with perinatal expertise. They can assess what medication is safe and appropriate during pregnancy or breastfeeding, and tailor the dosage to the unique needs of the perinatal period.
Medication is not a sign of weakness—it is a sign of commitment to your wellbeing.
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Breaking the Silence: You’re Not Alone, and You’re Not Failing
The most heartbreaking part of perinatal mood disorders is how often people suffer quietly because they believe they shouldn’t feel this way—or worse, that they deserve it.
But PMDs are medical conditions, not character flaws.
You are still a good parent even when:
• you’re struggling
• you’re exhausted
• you’re anxious
• you’re overwhelmed
• you feel disconnected
• you need help
• you choose therapy or medication
Your worth as a parent has never been defined by how easy or hard this season feels. It is defined by your presence, your intention, your love, and your willingness to care for yourself and your family.
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What Healing Can Look Like
Recovery from perinatal mood disorders doesn’t happen overnight. But with the right support, parents often describe:
• emotional clarity returning
• more laughter
• increased connection with their baby
• decreased anxiety
• better sleep
• less guilt
• renewed energy
• improved communication with partners
• rediscovery of their identity beyond parenthood
Healing is a gradual return to yourself. Not the person you were before baby—but the person you are becoming, with strength, compassion, and a deeper understanding of your own needs.
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You Deserve Support—Today, Not “When Things Get Worse”
If anything in this article resonates with you, or if you’re watching someone you love struggle, please know the following:
• Perinatal mood disorders are common.
• They are treatable.
• You are not alone.
• You deserve care.
• Help is available.
Whether you begin by speaking to a partner, a doctor, a therapist, or even a trusted friend, starting the conversation is an act of courage—and often the first step toward relief.
Supporting a parent through the perinatal period is not about judgment, comparison, or perfection. It is about compassion, understanding, and recognizing that the transition to parenthood is monumental. No one is meant to face it alone.